Top 10 Kiss Jokes

Updated on 09 Jan 2009, Published on 31 Dec 2008

Check out the Top 10 kiss jokes and laugh out loud! The funny kiss jokes are amusing enough to bring a smile on your face. So without taking much of your precious time, Top54u team brings to you some hilarious jokes on kiss. We hope you would love some, if not all, of them. Do let us know which joke was good, which joke was cool and which one just made you LOL!

 

1. DOG KISS

A couple was sitting in garden, suddenly the dogs starting kissing each other.
Boy: If you don't mind then I also want to do it?
Girl: I don't have a problem with you doing that but take care, the other dog looks quite dangerous.

2. WHO DID IT?

President Obama, John McCain, Sarah Palin and Angelina Jolie are traveling in a train which goes through a tunnel and it gets completely dark. Suddenly there is a kissing sound and then a slap! The train comes out of the tunnel. The women and McCain are sitting there looking perplexed. Obama is bent over holding his face, which is red from an apparent slap. All of them remain diplomatic without saying anything.
Sarah Palin thinks: These Americans are all crazy after Angelina Jolie. McCain must have tried to kiss her in the tunnel. Very proper that she slapped him.
Angelina Jolie thinks: McCain must have tried to kiss me but kissed Sarah Palin instead and got slapped.
Barack Obama thinks: Damn it. McCain must have tried to kiss either of the two ladies. They might have thought it was me and slapped me.
McCain thinks: If this train goes through another tunnel I will make another kissing sound and slap Obama again.

3. IN GEOMETRIC TERMS

"Kiss is the shortest distance between 2 lips!"

4. KISS OR NOT TO KISS?

Never kiss a police woman. She will say ‘Stop and hands up'
Never kiss a nurse. She will say ‘next'
Always kiss a teacher. She will say ‘repeat it 5 times'

5. CAB DRIVER AND A NUN

A cab driver picks up a nun. She gets into the cab, and the cabbie kept staring at her. She asked him why he was staring. He replied: "I have a question to ask you, but I don't want to offend you". She answered, "My son, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as I am and have been a nun as long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear just about everything. I'm sure that there's nothing you could say or ask that I would find offensive." "Well, I've always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me." She responded, "Well, let's see what we can do about that. But first, you have to be single and you must be Christian." The cab driver excitedly said, "Yes, I'm single and Christian!" "OK" the nun said. "Pull into the next alley, "maybe we will see what we can do." The nun fulfills his fantasy with a ‘too hot to believe' kiss. But when they get back on the road, the cab driver started cried. "My dear child," said the nun, why are you crying?"
"Forgive me, but I've sinned. I lied. I must confess, I'm married and I'm Jewish."
The nun said, "That's OK, my name is Frank and I'm going to a Halloween party."

6. DEFINITION OF ‘KISS' IN ECONOMICS:

"Kiss is that thing 4 which DEMAND is always higher than SUPPLY!"

7. BLONDE AND BILL GATES

Bill Gates: I want to kiss you?
Blonde: You have to give me your entire Property in return!
Bill Gates: That's not possible!
Blonde: You miser, Now I will teach you a lesson by kissing you for free!
She gave him a kiss for free and felt too smart!

8. PRINCESS AND A FROG

Once upon a time, in a land far away, a beautiful, independent, self assured princess happened upon a frog as she sat, contemplating ecological issues on the shores of an unpolluted pond in a verdant meadow near her castle. The frog hopped into the princess lap and said "Elegant Lady, I was once a handsome prince, until an evil witch cast a spell upon me. One kiss from you, however, and I will turn back into the dapper, young prince that I am, and then, my sweet, we can marry and setup housekeeping in castle with my mother, where you can prepare my meals, clean my clothes, bear my children, and forever feel grateful and happy doing so."
That night, the princess had frog legs seasoned in a white wine and shallot cream sauce in her dinner.

9. IN COMPUTER LANGUAGE

"Kiss is like a LAN, in which 2 bodies are connected without any Data Cable!"

10. KISS IS.....

Kiss is like Nokia as well as Nike: ‘Connecting People' and ‘Just Do It.'


Also read Top 10 Pregnancy Jokes and feel free to share your precious views or inputs!

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